January was a stressful haze during which I had very little time or energy with which to write. My day job has been super intense and I worked at least 10 hours most days. When I did get home from work, my brain was mush. But while I can certainly use that as an excuse not to finish up the last few scenes I wanted to add to Noir after analyzing my outline, it really comes down to procrastination.
Not the usual lazy type of procrastination, but the desire to stay in this safe zone for a bit longer. Because, after I finish these scenes then I have to start line editing. And after line edits and edits from beta readers and a another read-through, then comes querying. And once I start querying, there will be the inevitable rejections. With Countless, I developed a very thick skin, and I really was barely phased by most rejections. But with Noir, I have fresh baby skin, and its so nice and warm in this cocoon of not-there-yet. For now, I can still relish in the wonder of my creation, and keep it to myself.
Of course, I realize that I'm lingering, and I'm going to stop. Work has finally slowed to a normal pace, so I have zero screens to hide behind. I'm a tough chic, and I'm going to sail this ship straight into the stormy seas of querydom. Hey, I love thunderstorms.
So, pep talk over. Got my Captain Jack hat on. And my compass. And my rum. How about you?