A Very Sad Goodbye

My dear pony Mocha died last night. I think it was peaceful. He was very old and had been lethargic and just not himself the last few days, so I had suspected he was going soon and was able to say my goodbyes. When I went out this morning to feed the horses he was just lying in the pasture.

I remember when I first got him almost five years ago how he was such a rascal and would never let me catch him in the pasture. We worked together and soon he got over that silly habit. We had been told that he was very skittish and abused by someone in the past, and so it was hard to win his trust.

I remember how he would always chase my huge warmblood away from his food, though he was less than half his size, if I didn't seperate them during feeding time. He was so bossy to the other horses, but so dear and sweet to his people.

I remember when I made him wear a Santa hat and pose for Christmas pictures a few years ago, and how when I was squatting on the ground trying to get a good angle since he was so small that he kept coming up and snuffling my face with his soft muzzle. He was the cutest Christmas pony ever.

I remember last November when he an abcess in his eyeball of all places, and I had to give him five different medications ten times a day, all through the middle of the night even though I had to get up at 6:30 for work. That went on for two weeks, and then the medications were weaned off slowly, but all in all it was six weeks of intensive care putting medicine in his eye. I didn't even have to put a halter or leadrope on him. He just stood there and let me mess with his eyeball. Even though we were close before that, I think that experience made us truly trust each other.

He was part of my inspiration for Everdream, my last novel about living carousel ponies. The specific character he inspired was Onyx, a grumpy, bossy jet black pony that is part of the dream caravan. When this gets published, he will be on the dedication page.

This morning after I found him I noticed that a single magnolia bud was on the tree, and just a few minutes ago when I went to pick flowers for his grave, I saw that it had fully bloomed, just in the last couple hours. White and perfect just for him. I placed it in his grave along with some blue hydrangeas.

I will miss you, old friend. May your spirit be boundless and joyful wherever you travel.